Trusting God?

this whole trusting God thing is getting really discouraging. I mean, I chose to move, thinking that it was what he wanted. Since then, he's seemed every further away. God never really seemed that close to me and I had hoped that moving would help change that. Now that I've moved, I'm really starting to question both God and moving.

It sure seems like God gives me the opposite of what I ask for. Matthew 7:8-11 says "Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened. Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!" It's talking about a father giving his son the opposite of what was asked for. It sure feels like God is doing that to me though. It sucks.

I hear and am prayed for that I will trust God...but if he's worth trusting, why doesn't he show that to me? Why doesn't he show me that he's the father who blesses with good gifts? Why doesn't he make himself real to me and show me who he really is?


I don't know. I wish I did.

VVS 2012

Soooo vvs is officially over. Like usual, it went by insanely fast.

Highlights included:

-jumping in the pool with our normal clothes on.
-comparing Norwegian and American politics in the hot tub.
-getting asked out (that included going swimming, but this time without my clothes on...) by a slightly drunk but mostly hungover guy.
-meeting Rand Paul and having a mind blank moment that resulted in no pic or autograph with him.
-running into Sam Roher and finally getting a picture with him.
-skipping the gala to pack up and move the conference out, have a pallet fall off as it was going on the truck, running up and down stairs and service elevators, riding metro, getting shown what happened at the FRC shooting, and going to BGR: the burger joint.
-A bajillion inside jokes about spoons and a failed attempt at a practical joke that involved spoons and got hotel security called on us.
-a bajillion inside jokes about everything.
-claiming our own student staff room to play cards and laugh.
-making friends with the security guards.
-having several people misunderstand me saying "Belgian Malanios" (the secret service/police k-9s)
as "Belgian melon" and having quite a lot of confusion.
-"seet down deeners" and super fancy "just cookies."
-laughter, laughter and more laughter.
-metro surfing and new awesome friends.
-skinny jeans and stories that involve them.


Yeah. So my feedback may not be why everyone wants. I was honored to be student staff and had a blast.

I also walked out of Paul Ryan's speech because I'm sick of the bs that he and Romney keep spreading. The "heckler" that yelled "corporations are not people" during his speech was right on. But I digress.

This, however, made me the most mad. Other than being told that I must remove the Ron Paul pin from my backpack. Watch the two videos.

http://holybulliesandheadlessmonsters.blogspot.com/2012/09/getequal-protests-values-voters-summit.html?m=1

Basically, some lgbt people showed up and protested. Okay. Cool. They also were causing a scene and ruckus so got escorted out. Okay. Cool.


Uhm. But wait. Did you notice the attendees? How rude and disrespectful they were? Lgbt people are humans too. They're people too. I saw this happen and I just watched. I felt no need to counter-protest or push anyone around. However, I must say that the actual escortation (new word, k? k.) wasn't nearly as violent as it looks in any videos online that I can find.

anyhow. VVS was amazing and I can't wait for next year. I haven't laughed that much in such a long time and it was good. I felt like I fit in really well and was accepted. It was cool.